Decision Points

In the middle of major life change, you often have to make significant decisions while simultaneously dealing with the emotional weight of everything that has happened. This is one of the most difficult human predicaments: being asked to navigate by the stars when the sky is overcast. Decision Points was written for exactly this situation.

The book begins with a clear analysis of what makes decision-making hard in transition: the cognitive load of emotional processing, the way grief and fear distort risk assessment, the tunnel vision that comes from stress, and the difficulty of imagining a future when the past has been so thoroughly disrupted. Understanding these impairments allows you to compensate for them deliberately rather than being blindsided by decisions that feel obvious in retrospect and impossible in the moment.

The decision framework presented is designed specifically for high-stakes decisions in emotionally complex situations. It works through five stages: stabilisation (ensuring you are in a sufficient window of tolerance to make good decisions), values alignment (checking that the decision is actually about what matters to you), information gathering (getting what you need without being overwhelmed), perspective taking (deliberately including viewpoints your current state is excluding), and commitment (making and standing behind a decision while remaining open to new information).

The book also addresses the post-decision challenge: living with decisions you can't undo in ongoing uncertainty, and the capacity for "decision peace" — the ability to commit fully to a chosen path even while acknowledging you could be wrong.